Woodworkingville

 

There once was a place called Fastener Land. The capital of Fastener Land, Woodworkingville, was founded by Mayor Quickscrews over 28 years ago. What started as just a small village woodshop has blossomed into a prosperous and flourishing city. This shining example of innovation and creativity has set the standard for woodworking across all of Fastener Land. Now, Woodworkingville’s New Online Store - www.quickscrews.com - sells and ships to and from within all of Fastener Land, same day or next. Come relive the journey over the next few weeks as we share the recent history of Woodworkingville, the tale of its Mayor, and how both have become sources of inspiration and innovation for all citizens of Fastener Land... and places far beyond.


Week 1

Mayor Quickscrews was walking down the street when all of a sudden he heard someone calling from behind him.

 “Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the woodworker said, running after Mayor Quickscrews. “I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“Slow down fellow citizen, my woodworking solutions are in fact what have helped Woodworkingville innovate for the past 28 years. What can I help you with?” 

“Well, drilling a pilot hole often takes too much time, but when I don’t, sometimes the screws I use break, and sometimes the wood splits, and other times the screw won’t even sit flush! Is there anything I can do?”

Judging the problem, Mayor Quickscrews proclaimed, “You need a product that can self-countersink, while not causing the wood to split either, and you need a screw strong enough to do those things without breaking.”

“Where can I find something like that?”

“Woodworkingville’s local online store, www.Quickscrews.com, carries screws with just the features you are looking for: Nibs and Type 17 Auger Points. The Nibs allow the head to create a countersunk hole and sit flush in whatever material you’re working with. The Type 17 Point at the tip of the screw is specifically designed to clean out the hole when drilling so that debris within the hole does not cause a split.

“And this will work in hardwoods, such as oak, red oak and maple?”

“No pilot hole needed, no problem.”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews!”

“Like I’ve always said, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 2

While checking in on the city’s cabinet making Shoppe, Mayor Quickscrews was approached by the owner...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the cabinet shop owner exclaimed. “I’m glad you’re here because I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation is just that, fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?”

“In the past, I have been making cabinets using drywall screws to attach wood cabinets, and drilled sheet metal screws into wood to attach hardware.”

“Let me stop you right there,” Mayor Quickscrews said. “Neither of those screws are actually designed for wood. I suggest you try out one of the original Quickscrews designs, a deep threaded particle board screw. These screws have a coarser thread that will allow the screw to drive faster and hold better. Now you have a product designed to fit your needs that can work with both of those applications.”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews!”

Before leaving the Shoppe the Mayor smiled and said, “Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 3

Woodworkingville’s furniture maker was struggling with a broken chair when Mayor Quickscrews walked in…

 “Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the furniture maker yelled. “As you can see, I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation is beginning to precede me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“I’m constantly working with hardwoods such as hickory and hard maple, and screws with the standard Type 17 point just aren’t cutting it. Sometimes the wood just splits.”

“So you’re saying the standard Type 17 lacks enough cutting power to eliminate pre-drilling in hardwoods?” Mayor Quickscrews asked.

“RIght, and that’s the Hole point,” the furniture maker chuckled.

“You need to let the screw do the work, and the only screw that’s right for that type of job is our line of Quickcutters. These screws are designed with a double Type 17, inverted back to back in the middle of the shank. Reducing the torque of the screw relieves the stress of the material, completely eliminating cracking and splitting. Plus the screw can be driven quickly into the hardest of woods with no pilot hole.”

“Thanks Mayor Quickscrews!” said the furniture maker, “Oh, but what about screws matching the color of the furniture?”

The Mayor answered, “They come with painted heads to match most aesthetically pleasing finishes. Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 4

The Mayor was brainstorming ways to make his city better when a handyman from out of town came into his office...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the handyman said as he approached Mayor Quickscrews. “I came far from outside of Woodworkingville to seek your help. I hear you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation truly precedes me traveling citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions to all of Fastener Land. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“My friend and I are building face frame cabinets, the pocket hole screws our town has sometimes work but sometimes break, and our peers say, ‘that’s just the way it is.’”

“Screws that only work some of the time? That’s ridiculous!” Mayor Quickscrews asserted, “I will not allow such a travesty in Fastener Land!”

“Well, when we try to draw the joints tightly together, sometimes the screw strips out of the material or breaks the screw entirely.”

“You need to try this,” Mayor Quickscrews said, holding out a Modified Pan Head Pocket Hole Screw. “This head has been beefed up and has a fillit underneath, this not only strengthens the head but strengthens the neck as well. More importantly, I have deepened the drive, so you’ll now able to get the drive fully engaged in the head instead of the shank. Now you will have a screw you can over-torque, a screw that fits neatly in the pocket hole, a screw that will draw the joints tightly together, it will eliminate breaking! And it will do it easily.”

“Thank you Mayor Quickscrews! I must tell my town about Woodworkingville and its glorious solutions!”

“You’re welcome back any time, Woodworkingville was built to provide innovative woodworking solutions. And like I always say,” Mayor Quickscrews winked goodbye, “don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 5

Late on Halloween night, Mayor Quickscrews was in his office when all of a sudden he heard a loud knocking on his door!

Knock, Knock, Knock

Through his window, he could see the silhouette of a strange looking man... if he even was a man!

Mr. Mayor hid behind his desk and responded timidly, "H-hello? Is someone there?"

The door slowly opened and...

One of the cabinet shoppe’s apprentices walked into Mayor Quickscrews' office!

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the cabinet maker frantically called out. “I need your help. I recall when you were in the shoppe and I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“Oh hello! You gave me quite a fright!” said Mayor Quickscrews, relieved. “My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?”

“I have a terrifying situation that I need help with! I often attach cabinet doors onto the cabinets, and when I attach the door to the frame, I get these cracks above and below the hinge.”

“Uh-oh, that is scary, indeed!” Mayor Quickscrews responded.

The cabinet maker went on, “My coworkers tell me not to worry about it, but these cracks haunt my nightmares! Sometimes they have me sand and putty over the cracks, but that’s only a temporary solution.”

“That’s no good, the head is causing the split in the wood when you drive it into the hinge. You should try my line of Undercut Screws sold on Quickscrews.com. The undercut design of the head eliminates the splitting when you drive it in, plus the Type 17 Point helps to penetrate and eliminate potential splitting even in the hardest of woods.”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews, I’ll no doubt be praised for utilizing your ingenuity!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 6

When overseeing a renovation project at the Spiral Point Mall, Mayor Quickscrews noticed a frustrated man surrounded by cabinets.

The man spotted the Mayor and said, "Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor, I need your help! I understand you're a man who knows woodworking issues."

"My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions," Mayor Quickscrews recited, "Who might you be?"

"I'm a commercial cabinet maker," the man replied.

"Any commercials I've seen?" Mayor Quickscrews joked.

The man paused... "I need a screw that can drive into metal studs and wood studs, and be able to withstand much higher levels of scrutiny and shear."”

“I have just the thing,” Mayor Quickscrews refocused. “Try my Woodwork Institute Approved line of QX² Screws. They’re made with a hi-low thread to provide stronger holding power in wood studs, and help bind while installing into metal studs. The Self-Piercing Needle Point will push through wood studs like butter, and the Quickcutter feature acts as a tap for the wood. Reduced torque will help you in effortlessly driving over your head.”

“That sounds amazing,” the man stated, “What is the shear value of the screw?”

“The shear value exceeds 80,000 lbs per square inch. The cabinets would essentially disintegrate before being pulled off the wall. Now that’s sheer value.”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 7

Now that the Spiral Point Mall renovation was complete and the mall was reopened to the public, Mayor Quickscrews walked through the Mall to enjoy the company of his fellow citizens...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” a woman with a drawer slide in her hand yelled. “I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation continues to precede me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“As you can see, I make drawers. I use European drawer slides mostly…”

“And you need a screw that will work in that application?”

“Exactly! Do you have anything like that?”

“Miss, Mayor Quickscrews can always find the solution. You need to try my #6 screws with a larger outside head diameter. They will allow you to use the screws in the base plate, and because you’re bottom mounting the drawer slides, the larger head will fasten below the drawer box and won’t get in the way of anything. It’s also the screw Blum recommends for Blumotion Slides.”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.


Week 8

Mayor Quickscrews was walking through different floors of Assembly Screw City Hall when he noticed an office being renovated...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor! I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“I’m a DIY-er and I’m building a cabinet with drawers for my office, but the drawers keep clicking when I open and close them. What should I do?”

“That reminds me of when I built the cabinets in my office. Because the drawer slides attach to the side of the cabinet, if the screw head is too tall, the drawer slide will catch the head and make it a pain to open and close. What you should try is our low profile drawer slide screws. The low profile head clears the rollers so you have a nice, smooth opening and closing of your drawer. Woodworkingville’s local online store offers low profile pan, truss and round washer heads.”

“Wow my friends are right about you Mayor Quickscrews, you have a solution for everything!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 9

Mayor Quickscrews’ car needed maintenance so he took it to the mechanic’s shoppe...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the mechanic waved to Mayor Quickscrews. “Your car is fixed, but I need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“When I am using an impact driver, the bits I use are always slipping and breaking and it’s infuriating!”

“I was equally furious about my car! What you need is my line of drive bits made specifically for impact drivers. These bits are made with chrome vanadium steel, and are designed to withstand the pressure from impact drivers. No more breaking, no more slipping, plus they’re packaged in plastic cases for organized storage.”

“Mayor Quickscrews, you’re the best, this repair is on the house!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”

 


Week 10

The Mayor had finally come up with an idea that would propel Woodworkingville further into the future, he was on site the construction project when...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the construction worker exclaimed. “We need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“Our bit holders are junk. I have some magnetic ones, but the bits slip out. And my buddy has some quick release ones, but the screws always fall off. We’re tired of unreliable bit holders! We just want something that will help us do our job better without all the frustration.”

“Never fear my friends, Mayor Quickscrews always has the answer. You must try my new Ultra Magnetic Bit Holder. It uses a combined magnetic and quick release hold to keep the screws and bits cooperating. The quick release mechanism locks your bits in place, while the powerful magnet holds your screws on tight. No more slipping, no more falling, no more frustration!”

“Wow, thanks Mayor Quickscrews!”

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 11

While doing some holiday shopping, Mayor Quickscrews heard the voice of two children from behind him...

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” the little boy exclaimed. “We heard that you know all about woodworking! We need help finding a holiday present for our dad!”

“My reputation precedes me children, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?”

“Our dad loves woodworking and we want to get him a good present, but we don’t have very much money”, The little boy said as he pulled a ten-dollar bill out of his pocket.

“Well money is not a problem,” Mayor Quickscrews said. “All you need is a few dollars to get the perfect gift for a woodworker! My favorites have got to be the T-Handle Ratchet and the 6-in-1 Screwdriver, because I like to pretend I’m James Bond.”

The children giggled, “Thanks Mr. Mayor! Our dad is just as cool as James Bond, so those would be the perfect gift!”

“You’re welcome children!” Mayor Quickscrews yelled after the children as they ran down the street, then said to himself, “Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 12

Mayor Quickscrews was walking home from the office one night when he heard a strange animal like noise from behind him…

“Hhhhrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaeeeerrrrrrra”

“Mr. Mayor! Mr. Mayor! We could really use your help,” said a man Mayor Quickscrews knew he recognized from somewhere.

Mayor Quickscrews suddenly remembered where he had seen the man and his large animal friend and responded excitedly, “Well my reputation truly does precede me! I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?”

“Well, we need to make a few repairs and we could really use something that has a selection of drill bits so we can quickly deal with all different drives.”

“Well I have the perfect solution of you,” replied Mayor Quickscrews. “My Bit Kits have all of the bits you will need. They are also organized so you can easily find the right drive bit. Odds are, its exactly the product you’re looking for.”

“Never tell me the odds, but thanks for the help, Mayor,” the man responded with a smirk.

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Week 13

Mayor Quickscrews was returning home from work to celebrate Christmas with his family when he heard a high-pitched voice call his name…

“Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor!” called a man who looked unmistakably like an elf. “We need your help. I understand you’re a man who knows woodworking issues.”

“My reputation precedes me fellow citizen, I live to provide woodworking solutions. What can I help you with?” said Mayor Quickscrews.

“We need ideas for last minute Christmas gifts! We are running out!” the elf responded frantically.

“Oh that’s easy! No need to worry, just look at the Quickscrews Holiday Shopping Guide. We have the perfect gifts for any woodworker! Bit Kits, Screwdrivers, fun tools... it’s all online!” responded Mayor Quickscrews.

“Thank you so much Mayor Quickscrews! You definitely won’t be getting coal this year!” the elf replied while running back towards his workshop.

“Like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”


Final Week

Mayor Quickscrews was at home celebrating New Year’s Eve with his closest friends and family and reminiscing on the last year in Woodworkingville.

“It truly was an amazing year,” he thought to himself as he gazed out the window at the fireworks. “I’m so excited to spend all of 2016 providing woodworking solutions to the citizens of Woodworkingville. If they ever need anything, they can be sure that Quickscrews can solve their problem. After all, like I always say, don’t get screwed, use Quickscrews.”